I just ran across a post on Facebook about a guy who has decided he is not a Christian and has left the church. Honestly, my heart is so grieved. It's not anger, it's so much more than that. It's pain. I hurt because so many have found the church to be so lacking in the grace and love of God. While I want to understand them I simply struggle to see how people cannot see all of the good in HIS church.
The church is flawed, greatly so, because it is made up of humans like me that fall so short of His glory. Yet, isn't that the story of Jesus? That He can take such imperfect vessels like me and use them to bring His love and power to those in need.
If that hasn't been your experience then maybe you aren't looking in the right places. There are some bad churches out there. There are some selfish pastors and Christians out there, but there are so many people who honestly love God and the world He has created out there.
I think that too often people just see what they want, OR EXPECT to see. I was a pastor for 15 years. In that 15 years I encountered some really unChrist-like Christians, quite a few to be honest. (I fit that bill too often myself.) But I chose not to dwell on that; I chose to see the good in people. I chose to see that in most of the people I encountered that if you could see past the weakness of their flesh, there was love. In some I had to look REALLY deep, and in a few I never could see it. But in most there was this true desire to know and love Jesus and to really be like Him.
Just today I heard from a good friend who is a pastor. He pastors a relatively small church and I'm sure he does not make a lot of money. Yet, this man believes in what I have dedicated my life to. He believes that Christ is the answer. He believes that when people encounter the love of Christ their lives are transformed. He also believes, as I do, that without Christ people are missing their very purpose for living. He believes this so much that he made a very generous and sacrificial commitment to help us spread everywhere that incredible love of Christ. He's going to have to make some sacrifices to keep his commitment to us, but he does it because he wants others to experience the incredible love of Christ that he has encountered. In earthly terms he gains nothing by this commitment. Few if any will ever know he even does it. But he does it out of conviction and love.
I want to be honest with you, this man is not the exception. There are so many Christians who make sacrifices everyday without seeking attention or accolades; they just do it because they are motivated by love.
My original intent was to go on and share about what I think is wrong with the church and why I think some have come to the conclusions that the young man on FB has come to. But you know what? There are plenty of people out there pointing out what is wrong with the church. To my Christian friends I just want to encourage you to keep on believing. Don't look for the flaws. Don't be part of the problem. Resolve every day to allow the aroma of Christ to be strong in your life. And when you encounter those who have lost faith in Christianity don't just push them away...embrace them with the love of Christ and try to show them there is more than they have experienced.
To those who are disillusioned with the church and Christianity I just want to challenge you to look a little deeper. I'm sorry for the failures of the church. I'm sorry for the times I have been part of the problem. But if you'll look a little deeper you will find some very special people there who really love Jesus and really do reflect His values!
Friday, March 23, 2012
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Disappointed in God
Wow, the title of the post hopefully got your attention...I guess so since you are reading this. Have you ever been "disappointed in God". I'm sensing that my brother and niece may be wrestling with those feelings today. About a year ago, a friend of my niece was serving in Afghanistan when he was shot through the neck by a sniper, his name was Jamie. For the last year my niece and my brother have been faithfully lifting this American warrior before the Lord praying for his healing.
On Monday of this week the news was getting bad; my brother called me and asked me to get the word out and ask our partners in ministry to pray. He told me he was convinced that God would heal Jamie. Yesterday Jamie died. My niece Tiffany, sent me a message last night thanking me for my prayers and expressing her anger. I really hurt for Tiffany. I hurt for Jamie's family. I hurt for my brother. I too, wish God had healed Jamie...a physical healing so that he could continue to be a husband, father, son and friend to those who loved him so much.
This news took me back to a very similar situation in my life. It was something that shook me as few things ever have. A few years back when I was a pastor, a lady in our church was diagnosed with lung cancer; the prognosis was not good. I called the church to fast and pray. During one such time of prayer over the lunch hour I really believed God spoke to me and said He would heal Loretta. I was thoroughly convinced. For the next year and a half, in spite of what I could plainly see with my eyes, I continued to believe and proclaim boldly that God was going to heal Loretta. Then came the call....
It was a Sunday morning about 4 a.m. when Loretta's husband Mark called me to tell me that she was gone. I had been with them the night before and everything I could see with my eyes told me that her parting was near, but I continued to believe. I was shocked when Mark called me. I was angry. I was devastated. I was embarrassed to go to church that morning. How could I stand in front of the people after telling them for a year and a half that God would heal Loretta and tell them she was dead? I have seldom if ever been more confused about my faith. I was so confident that God had spoken to me. I had begged him to tell me if I was wrong. I was shattered.
I cannot tell you what a deep impact that had on me. The fact is my hurt still lingers. But at some point I had to come to a place where I could say to God, "I trust you." I can't explain what happened. Some try to comfort me with the knowledge that God had indeed healed Loretta, but the truth is that isn't the kind of healing I was proclaiming. Bottom line, I was wrong. And when I think about it...that isn't that hard to believe, I'm frequently wrong.
So that brings me back to my brother and Tiffany. What do I say to them now? What did I learn from my experience? Well, first of all God is Sovereign and we don't get to dictate how He should run things. We are allowed to question. I mean, He's not afraid of our questions as if we are going to trip Him up or something! But He is still God...and we are not.
The next thing we need to understand is that we only see a very small piece of a much bigger picture, God sees the whole thing. We cannot possibly know how everything in life fits together. We don't know what's going to happen five minutes from now, much less 5 years from now.
We also need to believe that God is good. That He really does love His creation. I have learned that it doesn't require much faith to trust God when He does things the way I want Him to. As long as He follows my lead it's pretty easy. Real faith comes when I have to trust Him without understanding. Faith remains confident in the goodness of God when the circumstances around me seem to be screaming something else.
I wish God had healed Loretta and confirmed me as a prophet. I wish God had healed Jamie, that seems like it would have been a great faith builder for my brother and niece. But I don't get to decide that. And it's good that I don't because I have no idea how all of this will ultimately work out. I do however, believe in the goodness of God and I will trust Him---even when He doesn't do it my way.
Would you join me in praying for Sgt. Jarboe's family? They need to sense the goodness of God in this very tough time.
On Monday of this week the news was getting bad; my brother called me and asked me to get the word out and ask our partners in ministry to pray. He told me he was convinced that God would heal Jamie. Yesterday Jamie died. My niece Tiffany, sent me a message last night thanking me for my prayers and expressing her anger. I really hurt for Tiffany. I hurt for Jamie's family. I hurt for my brother. I too, wish God had healed Jamie...a physical healing so that he could continue to be a husband, father, son and friend to those who loved him so much.
This news took me back to a very similar situation in my life. It was something that shook me as few things ever have. A few years back when I was a pastor, a lady in our church was diagnosed with lung cancer; the prognosis was not good. I called the church to fast and pray. During one such time of prayer over the lunch hour I really believed God spoke to me and said He would heal Loretta. I was thoroughly convinced. For the next year and a half, in spite of what I could plainly see with my eyes, I continued to believe and proclaim boldly that God was going to heal Loretta. Then came the call....
It was a Sunday morning about 4 a.m. when Loretta's husband Mark called me to tell me that she was gone. I had been with them the night before and everything I could see with my eyes told me that her parting was near, but I continued to believe. I was shocked when Mark called me. I was angry. I was devastated. I was embarrassed to go to church that morning. How could I stand in front of the people after telling them for a year and a half that God would heal Loretta and tell them she was dead? I have seldom if ever been more confused about my faith. I was so confident that God had spoken to me. I had begged him to tell me if I was wrong. I was shattered.
I cannot tell you what a deep impact that had on me. The fact is my hurt still lingers. But at some point I had to come to a place where I could say to God, "I trust you." I can't explain what happened. Some try to comfort me with the knowledge that God had indeed healed Loretta, but the truth is that isn't the kind of healing I was proclaiming. Bottom line, I was wrong. And when I think about it...that isn't that hard to believe, I'm frequently wrong.
So that brings me back to my brother and Tiffany. What do I say to them now? What did I learn from my experience? Well, first of all God is Sovereign and we don't get to dictate how He should run things. We are allowed to question. I mean, He's not afraid of our questions as if we are going to trip Him up or something! But He is still God...and we are not.
The next thing we need to understand is that we only see a very small piece of a much bigger picture, God sees the whole thing. We cannot possibly know how everything in life fits together. We don't know what's going to happen five minutes from now, much less 5 years from now.
We also need to believe that God is good. That He really does love His creation. I have learned that it doesn't require much faith to trust God when He does things the way I want Him to. As long as He follows my lead it's pretty easy. Real faith comes when I have to trust Him without understanding. Faith remains confident in the goodness of God when the circumstances around me seem to be screaming something else.
I wish God had healed Loretta and confirmed me as a prophet. I wish God had healed Jamie, that seems like it would have been a great faith builder for my brother and niece. But I don't get to decide that. And it's good that I don't because I have no idea how all of this will ultimately work out. I do however, believe in the goodness of God and I will trust Him---even when He doesn't do it my way.
Would you join me in praying for Sgt. Jarboe's family? They need to sense the goodness of God in this very tough time.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Heritage
This last weekend I had the opportunity to reconnect with a good friend from my childhood, Alan Shinnebarger. We grew up in the same church together and our families have been friends for probably 65+ years. (Neither of us is that old by the way!) We had a great time together reminiscing about the past as well as sharing our vision for the future.
My time with Alan reminded of how blessed I am to have a godly heritage. It begins with family. I have been blessed with parents and grandparents who love Jesus and taught me to do the same. But I am blessed to have even more than that, I was blessed to have grown up in an awesome church with a community of believers who challenged me to love God; a community that continues to inspire me and support me as I pursue God's purpose for my life.
If you know me at all then you know how much I love the church. I love the church. I love the idea of the church. I love the the head of the church. I love the body that belongs to that head. I just love the church.
Maybe my love for the church stems from the fact that I grew up in such an awesome church. Bethel Church in Quincy is my home church. I've been gone from there for 20 years now, but my love for that church has never waned and neither has their support for me.
I learned about humility, faithfulness and love from such sweet ladies as Margie Stone, Irene Kampe and Mae Seize. (As a little boy I literally thought Margie was Jesus.) These ladies are unknown to the world outside of Bethel, but they are known in heaven.
Then there are the men of God who modeled for me that manliness and godliness are not mutually exclusive but complimentary attributes. Men that taught me you could be strong and brave and yet weep uncontrollably before the Lord.
Bob Guthrie and Clarence Rumsey were two such men. Both were men's men. I believe Bob was a construction worker, a strong, good-looking man that a boy could look up to. Clarence was a cop and then a fireman...how manly is that? And yet, both of these men modeled such an incredible love and gentleness. Both had a huge impact on my life.
Those of you who know me well and know my testimony know that it was through the faithfulness of the incredible people of Bethel Church that God called a struggling prodigal home. On my wedding day I was struck at how many of those "hypocrites" from the church showed up to celebrate one of life's biggest moments with me. In spite of the fact that I had been shunning the church for years, they came. It started with Carrie Williams shuffling into the church with a present bigger than she was. Then the ceremony concluded with me walking down the aisle of the church with my new bride and the Spirit prompting me to notice all of the faces of those incredibly faithful people. I specifically remember the Lord speaking to my heart when I saw Rich Sederwall and Al Schlosser sitting there; it was probably at that moment that I began to think I needed to rise up out of my filth and head back to my Father's house.
And what did I find when I returned? Not only was the Father running down the lane to meet me, but my story was even better than the Prodigal's because I didn't come back to a jealous brother! My spiritual family welcomed me with open arms and rejoiced that I had found my way home.
Long before I was even a twinkle in my father's eye, my grandma and grandpa lived next door to the Sederwall family. My mom tells me that my Aunt Shirley used to invite those Sederwall kids to go to church with her. Turns out they all fell in love with Jesus. Faithfulness is cyclical isn't it? You never know when a life you impact today may be used to impact you or yours tomorrow!
So today I just want to thank God for my heritage. I had fun with Alan this weekend remembering all of those wonderful people. I was also really grateful to sit with someone who appreciates his heritage in Christ as much as I do.
Thank you Bethel Church. May your brightest days be yet ahead of you as you continue to stand as a beacon of light in Quincy, Illinos!
My time with Alan reminded of how blessed I am to have a godly heritage. It begins with family. I have been blessed with parents and grandparents who love Jesus and taught me to do the same. But I am blessed to have even more than that, I was blessed to have grown up in an awesome church with a community of believers who challenged me to love God; a community that continues to inspire me and support me as I pursue God's purpose for my life.
If you know me at all then you know how much I love the church. I love the church. I love the idea of the church. I love the the head of the church. I love the body that belongs to that head. I just love the church.
Maybe my love for the church stems from the fact that I grew up in such an awesome church. Bethel Church in Quincy is my home church. I've been gone from there for 20 years now, but my love for that church has never waned and neither has their support for me.
I learned about humility, faithfulness and love from such sweet ladies as Margie Stone, Irene Kampe and Mae Seize. (As a little boy I literally thought Margie was Jesus.) These ladies are unknown to the world outside of Bethel, but they are known in heaven.
Then there are the men of God who modeled for me that manliness and godliness are not mutually exclusive but complimentary attributes. Men that taught me you could be strong and brave and yet weep uncontrollably before the Lord.
Bob Guthrie and Clarence Rumsey were two such men. Both were men's men. I believe Bob was a construction worker, a strong, good-looking man that a boy could look up to. Clarence was a cop and then a fireman...how manly is that? And yet, both of these men modeled such an incredible love and gentleness. Both had a huge impact on my life.
Those of you who know me well and know my testimony know that it was through the faithfulness of the incredible people of Bethel Church that God called a struggling prodigal home. On my wedding day I was struck at how many of those "hypocrites" from the church showed up to celebrate one of life's biggest moments with me. In spite of the fact that I had been shunning the church for years, they came. It started with Carrie Williams shuffling into the church with a present bigger than she was. Then the ceremony concluded with me walking down the aisle of the church with my new bride and the Spirit prompting me to notice all of the faces of those incredibly faithful people. I specifically remember the Lord speaking to my heart when I saw Rich Sederwall and Al Schlosser sitting there; it was probably at that moment that I began to think I needed to rise up out of my filth and head back to my Father's house.
And what did I find when I returned? Not only was the Father running down the lane to meet me, but my story was even better than the Prodigal's because I didn't come back to a jealous brother! My spiritual family welcomed me with open arms and rejoiced that I had found my way home.
Long before I was even a twinkle in my father's eye, my grandma and grandpa lived next door to the Sederwall family. My mom tells me that my Aunt Shirley used to invite those Sederwall kids to go to church with her. Turns out they all fell in love with Jesus. Faithfulness is cyclical isn't it? You never know when a life you impact today may be used to impact you or yours tomorrow!
So today I just want to thank God for my heritage. I had fun with Alan this weekend remembering all of those wonderful people. I was also really grateful to sit with someone who appreciates his heritage in Christ as much as I do.
Thank you Bethel Church. May your brightest days be yet ahead of you as you continue to stand as a beacon of light in Quincy, Illinos!
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Fear
THE FEAR OF THE LORD IS THE BEGINNING OF WISDOM
I might have said it like this: The fear of the Lord is really hard to understand! Hang with me here friends, I'm not a heretic, I'm just trying to be honest about my own limited understanding. When it comes to the fear of the Lord I'm afraid I have been prone to swing to opposite extremes in my life. When I was young I viewed God as a very unhappy man who was looking for a reason to destroy me; that view didn't encourage much of a relationship with God.
As I grew older and in theory wiser, (ha ha), that pendulum began to sweep rapidly in the other direction: If God really loves me so much He could never be angry with me for anything. That too put some real strain on our relationship.
So, in effect, I have made God out to be an over-bearing monster of a father or an over-indulgent, doting grandfather figure. Neither really seems to encourage relationship.
So what is healthy fear and why is it the beginning of wisdom? My children and the good people of Crossroads church can probably all tell you my definition of wisdom very quickly: Wisdom is the ability to make right choices. I've always craved wisdom, for myself and for my children there is really nothing I've wanted more. I have prayed over my children every day that God would give them wisdom, the ability to make right choices. If they have that, well.....the rest should just fall in place.
So if the fear of God is the key to that, what is healthy fear? Well let me share a little story to illustrate what it is not. When my kids were little I was a pretty strong disciplinarian, you know--the winters in Alaska are pretty cold kind of strong. One day, Zac had crossed some line, (as he was prone to do as a strong-willed little guy), and I unleashed all of my fury upon him. It was a Sodom and Gomorrah kind of unleashing. I was in his face yelling at the top of my lungs when I saw it in his eyes....fear. Unimaginable fear. At that precise moment something in my spirit said to me, this will not work. What I saw was not healthy. What I saw in that moment was not going to draw my son closer to me or make him want to have a relationship with me. It was a fear that was going to drive him far from me. I shut up and went into retreat and allowed God to change my perspective that day. Maybe that was my turning point on viewing God as some ogre who desired my destruction.
Okay, so that's not the kind of fear that leads to wisdom, but at other times in my life I've tended towards the "over-indulgent" grandpa view, and just to be honest with you, that doesn't work so well either. I mean let's face it, the parent who watches their child destroy themselves in the name of "love" isn't much of an example.
Let me take you back to my moment of retreat that day with Zac. I really felt like the Lord was saying to me that day that discipline only works when it is motivated by love. I wanted Zac to behave because I wanted good kids. I wanted everyone to tell me what wonderful kids I have, thereby validating me as a father. My deep seated motivation was pride. God wanted me to understand that I was headed for a great fall if I didn't deal with the motivation of my heart.
God is not espousing the fear of the Lord out of pride. God is God. He doesn't need you and I to prove anything about Him. He is no less God if people like Him or dislike Him. He's God. His motivation therefore cannot be pride. His motivation is love and love requires discipline.
When I have a healthy fear of God it compels me to make right choices. True fear is faith! When I walk toward the over-indulgent view of God I begin to embrace the idea that there are no consequences for my actions. If you follow that thinking to its logical conclusion you eventually wind up with unbelief. We go from "I can do what I want because God loves me so much He just wants me to be happy" to "I can do what I want because I am not accountable". That is unbelief!
Because I believe I obey. Because I believe I embrace accountability. I love God and strive to know and understand Him because there are consequences for knowing and loving God. I love my neighbor because there are consequences for loving my neighbor. I reject hatred because there are consequences for hatred. I live for eternity because I'm excited about where it leads me. I reject the temporal happiness that sin may afford me because of where it will lead me.
Healthy fear is just the exercise of faith. I believe therefore I embrace. Looks good on the computer screen, now if I can just live it out!
I might have said it like this: The fear of the Lord is really hard to understand! Hang with me here friends, I'm not a heretic, I'm just trying to be honest about my own limited understanding. When it comes to the fear of the Lord I'm afraid I have been prone to swing to opposite extremes in my life. When I was young I viewed God as a very unhappy man who was looking for a reason to destroy me; that view didn't encourage much of a relationship with God.
As I grew older and in theory wiser, (ha ha), that pendulum began to sweep rapidly in the other direction: If God really loves me so much He could never be angry with me for anything. That too put some real strain on our relationship.
So, in effect, I have made God out to be an over-bearing monster of a father or an over-indulgent, doting grandfather figure. Neither really seems to encourage relationship.
So what is healthy fear and why is it the beginning of wisdom? My children and the good people of Crossroads church can probably all tell you my definition of wisdom very quickly: Wisdom is the ability to make right choices. I've always craved wisdom, for myself and for my children there is really nothing I've wanted more. I have prayed over my children every day that God would give them wisdom, the ability to make right choices. If they have that, well.....the rest should just fall in place.
So if the fear of God is the key to that, what is healthy fear? Well let me share a little story to illustrate what it is not. When my kids were little I was a pretty strong disciplinarian, you know--the winters in Alaska are pretty cold kind of strong. One day, Zac had crossed some line, (as he was prone to do as a strong-willed little guy), and I unleashed all of my fury upon him. It was a Sodom and Gomorrah kind of unleashing. I was in his face yelling at the top of my lungs when I saw it in his eyes....fear. Unimaginable fear. At that precise moment something in my spirit said to me, this will not work. What I saw was not healthy. What I saw in that moment was not going to draw my son closer to me or make him want to have a relationship with me. It was a fear that was going to drive him far from me. I shut up and went into retreat and allowed God to change my perspective that day. Maybe that was my turning point on viewing God as some ogre who desired my destruction.
Okay, so that's not the kind of fear that leads to wisdom, but at other times in my life I've tended towards the "over-indulgent" grandpa view, and just to be honest with you, that doesn't work so well either. I mean let's face it, the parent who watches their child destroy themselves in the name of "love" isn't much of an example.
Let me take you back to my moment of retreat that day with Zac. I really felt like the Lord was saying to me that day that discipline only works when it is motivated by love. I wanted Zac to behave because I wanted good kids. I wanted everyone to tell me what wonderful kids I have, thereby validating me as a father. My deep seated motivation was pride. God wanted me to understand that I was headed for a great fall if I didn't deal with the motivation of my heart.
God is not espousing the fear of the Lord out of pride. God is God. He doesn't need you and I to prove anything about Him. He is no less God if people like Him or dislike Him. He's God. His motivation therefore cannot be pride. His motivation is love and love requires discipline.
When I have a healthy fear of God it compels me to make right choices. True fear is faith! When I walk toward the over-indulgent view of God I begin to embrace the idea that there are no consequences for my actions. If you follow that thinking to its logical conclusion you eventually wind up with unbelief. We go from "I can do what I want because God loves me so much He just wants me to be happy" to "I can do what I want because I am not accountable". That is unbelief!
Because I believe I obey. Because I believe I embrace accountability. I love God and strive to know and understand Him because there are consequences for knowing and loving God. I love my neighbor because there are consequences for loving my neighbor. I reject hatred because there are consequences for hatred. I live for eternity because I'm excited about where it leads me. I reject the temporal happiness that sin may afford me because of where it will lead me.
Healthy fear is just the exercise of faith. I believe therefore I embrace. Looks good on the computer screen, now if I can just live it out!
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Show me the way
I have noticed that Facebook has provided a great avenue for those who like to point out the flaws of the church to make their wisdom known. Daily I see people who find cute ways to criticize the church and it's members. That's awesome. I'm glad we have so many ways to express our opinions and influence others, it truly is an amazing time to be alive.
Here is what I would like to share on the topic today:
1. It takes no spiritual gifting to be a critic. Any fool can find fault in others. Anybody who can't see serious flaws in me is just blind! As a matter of fact, I invite you to give me a call if you're having trouble and I'll help you out because I am sure that you can't see even a fraction of the short-comings in my life.
2. I have never been afraid to admit I'm wrong, nor to learn from others. So here is what I would like you to do: If you are concerned about how the body of Christ has polluted the teachings of Christ and become irrelevant, how about you give us a new paradigm. Not with words mind you, words are cheap, show us how to do it correctly.
I'm not being a wise guy here, I'm totally serious. I really do think we need to rethink they way we "do" Christianity. I'm looking for some trailblazers to help lead the way. I've been thinking and praying about it a lot, we need to do better at "spreading everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of God". A lot of the aroma we're spreading around doesn't have much of a heavenly scent to it. I guess that includes those who seem to be making the case that the most spiritual thing we can be doing is pointing out how messed up everyone else is.
Talk is cheap. Let's shake things up. The church was God's idea. If it has become irrelevant then we need to figure out how to make it relevant again. If you're not willing to do that then it's hard for me to take any of your criticisms seriously.
Here is what I would like to share on the topic today:
1. It takes no spiritual gifting to be a critic. Any fool can find fault in others. Anybody who can't see serious flaws in me is just blind! As a matter of fact, I invite you to give me a call if you're having trouble and I'll help you out because I am sure that you can't see even a fraction of the short-comings in my life.
2. I have never been afraid to admit I'm wrong, nor to learn from others. So here is what I would like you to do: If you are concerned about how the body of Christ has polluted the teachings of Christ and become irrelevant, how about you give us a new paradigm. Not with words mind you, words are cheap, show us how to do it correctly.
I'm not being a wise guy here, I'm totally serious. I really do think we need to rethink they way we "do" Christianity. I'm looking for some trailblazers to help lead the way. I've been thinking and praying about it a lot, we need to do better at "spreading everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of God". A lot of the aroma we're spreading around doesn't have much of a heavenly scent to it. I guess that includes those who seem to be making the case that the most spiritual thing we can be doing is pointing out how messed up everyone else is.
Talk is cheap. Let's shake things up. The church was God's idea. If it has become irrelevant then we need to figure out how to make it relevant again. If you're not willing to do that then it's hard for me to take any of your criticisms seriously.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Today
I'm a day counter. Always have been. I joined the Navy when I was 18 years old and the first time I counted the days until I got out the count was 1380, if you do the math I think you will find that I was a few weeks into a 4 year enlistment when I started counting the days.
About 9 years ago I had the opportunity to go on a cruise with my brother and his wife. For six months I counted the days until we would leave on our cruise and the day we stepped onboard I started counting the days until it was over. My mom said my brother enjoyed the cruise but I enjoyed the anticipation of the cruise!
At the beginning of 2011 I counted the days until we would get back to America; once we got here I began counting the days until Christmas when we would have all of our kids home. The day we picked Chase up at the airport I was depressed because I knew it would be only 13 days before we had to say good-bye.
I told you...I'm a day counter.
You know what's sad about that? It's all the time I spend anticipating the future. While anticipation can be a great motivator what a waste it is to spend life counting our days. How much life do I miss counting days?
The fact is that in the whole scheme of things TODAY IS ALL THAT MATTERS! Yesterday is gone. Good or bad it is in the rear view mirror and it is not coming back. Tomorrow may never come and even if it does, worrying today is not going to change tomorrow.
So somehow I guess I need to learn to live today. Live today as if it is my only day. The great philosopher and country music singer Tim McGraw says it like this: "Someday I hope you have the chance to live like you were dying." What if I knew that today was it? What would I do? Maybe that's how I ought to live....just in case!
My New Year's resolution? I want to strive to live every day, I mean really LIVE every day.
About 9 years ago I had the opportunity to go on a cruise with my brother and his wife. For six months I counted the days until we would leave on our cruise and the day we stepped onboard I started counting the days until it was over. My mom said my brother enjoyed the cruise but I enjoyed the anticipation of the cruise!
At the beginning of 2011 I counted the days until we would get back to America; once we got here I began counting the days until Christmas when we would have all of our kids home. The day we picked Chase up at the airport I was depressed because I knew it would be only 13 days before we had to say good-bye.
I told you...I'm a day counter.
You know what's sad about that? It's all the time I spend anticipating the future. While anticipation can be a great motivator what a waste it is to spend life counting our days. How much life do I miss counting days?
The fact is that in the whole scheme of things TODAY IS ALL THAT MATTERS! Yesterday is gone. Good or bad it is in the rear view mirror and it is not coming back. Tomorrow may never come and even if it does, worrying today is not going to change tomorrow.
So somehow I guess I need to learn to live today. Live today as if it is my only day. The great philosopher and country music singer Tim McGraw says it like this: "Someday I hope you have the chance to live like you were dying." What if I knew that today was it? What would I do? Maybe that's how I ought to live....just in case!
My New Year's resolution? I want to strive to live every day, I mean really LIVE every day.
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