Fear

THE FEAR OF THE LORD IS THE BEGINNING OF WISDOM

I might have said it like this: The fear of the Lord is really hard to understand!  Hang with me here friends, I'm not a heretic, I'm just trying to be honest about my own limited understanding.  When it comes to the fear of the Lord I'm afraid I have been prone to swing to opposite extremes in my life.  When I was young I viewed God as a very unhappy man who was looking for a reason to destroy me; that view didn't encourage much of a relationship with God.

As I grew older and in theory wiser, (ha ha), that pendulum began to sweep rapidly in the other direction: If God really loves me so much He could never be angry with me for anything. That too put some real strain on our relationship.

So, in effect, I have made God out to be an over-bearing monster of a father or an over-indulgent, doting grandfather figure.  Neither really seems to encourage relationship.

So what is healthy fear and why is it the beginning of wisdom?  My children and the good people of Crossroads church can probably all tell you my definition of wisdom very quickly: Wisdom is the ability to make right choices.  I've always craved wisdom, for myself and for my children there is really nothing I've wanted more.  I have prayed over my children every day that God would give them wisdom, the ability to make right choices.  If they have that, well.....the rest should just fall in place.

So if the fear of God is the key to that, what is healthy fear? Well let me share a little story to illustrate what it is not.  When my kids were little I was a pretty strong disciplinarian, you know--the winters in Alaska are pretty cold kind of strong.  One day, Zac had crossed some line, (as he was prone to do as a strong-willed little guy), and I unleashed all of my fury upon him.  It was a Sodom and Gomorrah kind of unleashing.  I was in his face yelling at the top of my lungs when I saw it in his eyes....fear.  Unimaginable fear.  At that precise moment something in my spirit said to me, this will not work.  What I saw was not healthy.  What I saw in that moment was not going to draw my son closer to me or make him want to have a relationship with me.  It was a fear that was going to drive him far from me. I shut up and went into retreat and allowed God to change my perspective that day.  Maybe that was my turning point on viewing God as some ogre who desired my destruction.

Okay, so that's not the kind of fear that leads to wisdom, but at other times in my life I've tended towards the "over-indulgent" grandpa view, and just to be honest with you, that doesn't work so well either.  I mean let's face it, the parent who watches their child destroy themselves in the name of  "love" isn't much of an example.

Let me take you back to my moment of retreat that day with Zac.  I really felt like the Lord was saying to me that day that discipline only works when it is motivated by love.  I wanted Zac to behave because I wanted good kids.  I wanted everyone to tell me what wonderful kids I have, thereby validating me as a father.  My deep seated motivation was pride.  God wanted me to understand that I was headed for a great fall if I didn't deal with the motivation of my heart.

God is not espousing the fear of the Lord out of pride. God is God. He doesn't need you and I to prove anything about Him. He is no less God if people like Him or dislike Him. He's God.  His motivation therefore cannot be pride.  His motivation is love and love requires discipline.

When I have a healthy fear of God it compels me to make right choices.  True fear is faith!  When I walk toward the over-indulgent view of God I begin to embrace the idea that there are no consequences for my actions.  If you follow that thinking to its logical conclusion you eventually wind up with unbelief.  We go from "I can do what I want because God loves me so much He just wants me to be happy" to "I can do what I want because I am not accountable". That is unbelief!

Because I believe I obey. Because I believe I embrace accountability. I love God and strive to know and  understand Him because there are consequences for knowing and loving God.  I love my neighbor because there are consequences for loving my neighbor.  I reject hatred because there are consequences for hatred.  I live for eternity because I'm excited about where it leads me.  I reject the temporal happiness that sin may afford  me because of where it will lead me.

Healthy fear is just the exercise of faith.  I believe therefore I embrace.  Looks good on the computer screen, now if I can just live it out!